North Korea, Best Korea!
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
