dude i'm inner monologue high
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
My bed smells like the plague
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
