I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
