p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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