White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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