hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
