let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
