Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood