Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
