i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
It's official drugs can't kill me
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
