dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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