wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made out with two different species that night
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
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