Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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