ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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