Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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