we should wear snuggies to the strip club
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
