I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize