Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
