: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I faked an abortion last night.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
