I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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