I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
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He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
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So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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