Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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