Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
