yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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