Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
