I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
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If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
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We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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