I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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