You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
