One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
