I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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