i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
