My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize