winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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