so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize