Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
