I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
