Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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