whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Randomize
