Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
