I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
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