if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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