singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
