please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize