But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
