he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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