Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize