onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
