I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
