he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
