do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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