you guys were way drunker than both of me
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Randomize
